A "Duh" Moment #1

Well here's a (not) story. TCTMNBN has 91% of the market share for $1000+ computers. Duh! Do you *really* think that most people are going to spend $1000(+) for a computer if they can get one that does what they need well for cheaper?! Of course not!! It's no suprise whatsoever that TCTMNBN takes up 91% of that, and I'm suprised it's no 95%

This is hilarious

Steve published this as the "Windows Fail of the Day". I'm inclined to agree. Our OS has it's failures, TCTMNBN's OS X has it's failures too. It is hilarious. To help you laugh, here's another funny Windows moment, starring yours truly and his assistant. Enjoy.

TCTMNBN Updates Final Cut Studio 3 (with commentary)

I hate the PR people at Apple. Read this, then come back here for commentary.

You're back? Ok, here we go.
The headline: TCTMNBN Updates Final Cut Studio with More Than 100 New Features. If it's more than 100, why don't they tell us exactly how many? Many "New Features" are simply very little updates to old features. Thus, More than 100 means that the exact number is probably 100.7.3 or something like that. Also, What exactly are those "More Than 100" new features? Going through the press release, I actually see about 20 new features. That's enough to warrant a new release, as long as you include bug fixes, Windows 7 has about 20 features, plus A LOT of bug fixes. But wait. Bug fixes don't count as NEW features. Bug fixes are things that we're broken and are fixed now. Cheaper pricing is mentioned. Since it's TCTMNBN, I'd say that a lower price is a new feature, but as Apple users have themselves said, they don't care that it's cheaper, they want "quality." Whatever that means, since TCTMNBN is hardly quality, but, whatever.

Lastly, why in the world do they end their PR with the words:

Apple ignited the personal computer revolution in the 1970s with the Apple II and reinvented the personal computer in the 1980s with the Macintosh. Today, Apple continues to lead the industry in innovation with its award-winning computers, OS X operating system and iLife and professional applications. Apple is also spearheading the digital media revolution with its iPod portable music and video players and iTunes online store, and has entered the mobile phone market with its revolutionary iPhone.

That makes no sense. Whatsoever.

I'm really thinking this is an example of TCTMNBN's over-secrecy.

Fail.

Why we haven't built a ZunePhone

A lot of people have been hyping over TCTMNBN's iPhone and Palm's Pre. And a lot of people have been asking why we haven't made a ZunePhone. Well the answer is that the Zune isn't big enough (yet) for it to be worth it. Lots of people use Windows Mobile and while plenty of Apple fanboys hate it, many people love it as well. Also, TCTMNBN will probably agree with us here at Microsoft that the BlackBerry has an awful interface. Windows Mobile beats it easily. So for now, there's no need to build a phone that nobody will buy. Besides, unlike Palm, our business plan here at Microsoft is not to copy everything TCTMNBN does. So, does everyone understand that.

PS: The Zune HD is a first step towards a ZunePhone.

Oh, one other thing Steve

I heard about your new liver. How many times faster is it? *chuckle* But really, good thing it went well. It would be a major disaster for the computer community if you hadn't made it through.

(There, are you happy PR people?. *i hate lying*)

Calm down Steve

So, Steve wrote an article about why a Seattle TV station came out with some BS story about how iPods are exploding and how supposedly we (or as Steve affectionately calls us, the borg) payed that TV station to write the article. You know why we didn't, Steve? Because that would have been bad for everyone. Nobody knows the difference between an iPod and a Zune and an MP3 player. I know they're different, and you know they're different, but nobody seems to know the difference other than us. Second point, we know perfectly well how to pull off a well done ad campaign. The I'm a PC ads do it well. They're stupid, yes, but the point was to make the I'm a Mac & I'm a PC ads stupid. And even Arrington realized it worked. We would never make the kind of mistake that stupid lady did. All that was, was a lady who wanted to be on the local news. So why don't you relax for the next couple days, ok Steve? Oh, and great coverage of the whole Chrome (P)OS fiasco the other day. I mean, other than calling us the Borg.